THE SOUND OF MUSIC

Every day and on every campus we get to work with savant students. There is always one who dances to the beat of their own song. One who is moving to a rhythm that is foreign to the world around them. If you only look externally, you may miss the genius that is before you. You may become disillusioned by their lack of “proper social abilities” or “their apparent disinterest” in what you find to be important, but you must not blink or you’ll miss it, or not hear it, the sound of music that is playing.

The young urban mind cultivates genius amidst the trauma that it endures. Surviving the misfortunes of the inner city isn’t easy. To avoid collapse, young minds take dissonant sounds created by unspeakable traumas and they orchestrate exquisite symphonies for only them to hear. This sound of music brings peace to the fractured world they live in, and it calms their soul and protects their mind from catastrophe. 

As mentors, it is our privilege and our challenge to listen and move to the young songs of the city. We are to sway to their melodies and dance to the musical masterpieces that emanate from their beings. Effective mentoring depends on your ability to listen, hear, and move in harmony with them. Every song is dissimilar so mentors must be versed in every genre. 

Recently, I met an amazing young lady named Janayh. She is a 6th grader at Lopez Elementary in Pomona. She is mature beyond her years. At first meet, she stood out to me because of her constant movement. Whether alone or in a large group of peers you can always find Janayh swaying or dancing. She is a tiny little thing with a BIG personality and a smile that lights up the room. During our special weekly one on ones I noticed that even when having a normal conversation, without distraction, she continued to sway and move and dance to the sound of music. I asked, “I can tell you love music, do you always hear something in your brain?” She excitedly replied, “Oh yes, it constantly plays.” She seemed elated that someone else would notice the sounds that fill her world. It was as if it were the first time someone else could hear the same tune. Intrigued I inquired further, “Does it ever turn off?” She graciously replied, “No, never.” She wasn’t disappointed nor exasperated, she matter of factly stated the reality of her music. 

This concept stuck with me and motivated me to write this blog. What a quandary? How could I be successful in supporting and mentoring Miss Janayh if I couldn’t keep her attention? How could I help her to heal if I had to interrupt the precious song that soothed and protected her beautiful mind? The answer? I should not expect her to turn off the music nor should I expect her to understand the rhythm of life that I move and live to. Well….not just yet. 

Here are a few tips for you to successfully mentor students like Janayh:

1. Put the song on repeat

It is the responsibility of the mentor to know and memorize the song that plays. Every key change, bang of the hi-hat, and rise and fall of the music should be familiar. Know your mentee’s story and background. Observe them and interact with them in as many environments as possible.

2. Sing along

Inch by inch ensure your mentee that you are not there to change the track. Stay in this phase as long as necessary in order to earn their trust. They must not fear the possibility of the music changing or ceasing. Contrastly, mentees should find you taking them by the hand to dance and sing in tandem, harmonizing in duet.

3. Slowly change the tune

In time, as rapport is built and trust earned, ease into the changing of the tune. Recommend new songs. Invite them to hear your favorites, the classics. Assure students that you are accompanying them along the way as they take the risk. There are millions of beautiful songs that can be added to their discography. In their journey of discovery, as they grow and change, new music can be added to their playlist. Songs of transformation, empowerment, hope and love.

4. Introduce new artists

Building and rebuilding a student’s support system is a great thing. The more mentors (artists) that you can introduce them to the better. Feeling safe in the company of a few is better then suffering in isolation. 

5. Give away creative control 

Communicate to them that their life is their own. In the mentoring process students can often feel boxed in by their mentor’s expectations or desires for their life. Always assure them that you’re willing to go as fast or slow as they want. Assure them that whether they want to be a college student or a drug dealer, you’ll love them and ride with them as long as they’d allow you to, without judgement. 

 Written by Eric Vasquez